Archive for September, 2009

I was in a wonderful - the best - relationship I have ever had. Her name was Johanna and, although we were only 17 and still are, we were in love. However, her family hates me, and she won’t oppose her family, afraid that her family will be disappointed. Her family hates me and has still neglected to tell me and her why. Naturally, she submitted to her family and left me, last Tuesday. She still "loves" me like a friend, but I still love her like she is the world. She wants me to stop loving her as much as I do, but I know I can’t. I know that from experience. I developed a huge crush on a girl a few years ago and I never developed a relationship with her, albeit I did try. That ended with me being hospitalized - twice - and discovering that I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and I developed Major Depressive Disorder and Social Phobia. It has been almost three years and I have still not overcome that crush. Now I have to do it all over again! It could be 10 years by the time I am able to move on. People tell me there will be others, but I can’t trust anything positive. Of course there will be a girl I like in university, but why should I trust that relationship? Why should I be willing to risk so much for something that has never worked? Frankly, I could kill myself right now, for all I care. In fact, I almost did last Thursday and the school has me under suicide watch.

What the hell am I suppose to do?
Is death by best option?
How can I go about making sure I don’t develop one ever again? I have figured I’d put a picture of Johanna and the other girl on my door, so as to remind me to never try again.

You are amazing, TJ, and if that girl left you just because her family told her to, I honestly doubt she loved you as much as you loved her. Please be kind to yourself, there’s nothing wrong about you. Killing yourself is helpless, there is no point.
Please, please, please don’t.
I love you still buddy!

I started getting them when I was 18 and I just turned 20. Most of the time I get panicky I don’t end up having one, but get very dizzy and sick anyway. Well now it’s like I feel like this out of nowhere. For example, I realize that my college dorm room door is locked on the outside. Thinking I forgot my key, I automatically go into panic mode and feel sick. 2 seconds later I realize I have it, but still very dizzy and sick anyway for quite awhile. Why is this? I hate feeling like this all the time and it’s causing me more stress than I already have from school. Thanks in advance.

You just need to calm down and stay in control every time you feel panicky remind yourself that it’s not the end of the world.l You just got to stay confident in yourself. You know all the things that you have you have to stay in control to ease up the worrying or when there is something really big you can get really hurt.

I end up jerking my car. I become panicked as therefore have only driven car twice. I really need to get back driving . Don’t know why this is happening. Thought it would be like riding a bike. But now I’m petrified to drive without another driver with me in case I freak

Happened to me after a long illness> Got back in the car and I shook. the thing is you know that it is a responsibility to drive3 a car and things can go wrong. But I tell you, you would not hold a license if you were dangerous. This is first time out nerves. I agree with some of the advice. I rang an instructor and drove around for an hour. This was the confident boost I needed. I realized I really didn’t need the instruction. It was responsibility kicking in…I just wanted to be sure. Driving around for a short while (at clear times) also makes a lot of sense. Driving around a short distant again and again and again will soon get up remembering.
I’ll tell you know you will be surprised how soon it all comes back and how you get from A to B with out a thought.

Does anyone know how to end anxiety? It’s not a huge problem for me but I would like to know how to end anxiety as it’s kind of anyonning sometimes.

Okay, there are many different methods and it really depends on the person. I would suggest this website: http://www.articleredux.com/howtoendanxiety.php

They have helped many people and have many good methods to this problem. Hope this helps.

First, I just want to say that this is not an attempt to get attention, just a genuine question… although some advice might be appreciated.

I’m a 16 year old girl with severe OCD and Bipolar Disorder. I also have depersonalisation disorder. I’m supposed to be starting a new school in september, but I know I can’t cope. The alternative is to stay at home for a year without being able to work or really do anything due to my disorders. My shrink is currently trying different combinations of medications and I only see him once a month, he said he is too busy to make it more often. I know that these are lifelong disorders, and that my suffering isn’t going to go away. None of my friends have supported me and they all went around my old school saying I was making it up to get attention - which is completely untrue. I don’t have anyone I can talk to, I feel like things are just getting worse and worse and I can’t see a light at the end of the tunnel. Right now I think I’d rather be dead than live with these disorders for a lifetime. I know it’s selfish to take my own life, but I honestly don’t care at the minute. I figure it’s my decision…why should I have to suffer just so my mum (who’s the only person that would actually care at all - and we’re not that close) doesn’t feel bad? I’ve just stopped caring about anything. I don’t feel too hot or too cold, I don’t care whether I talk to friends or not, I don’t care what music I listen to, I don’t care if I don’t leave the house for months…in fact, I’d rather not leave the house for months. In the past, when things got tough, my father had always been there for me. Recently while I was living with him he beat me up leaving me with bruises and a broken arm… and he now refuses to talk to me. I feel like I’ve already lost everyone I cared about, so what is there to lose?

Is it time to end it all? It seems like more of a risk to stay living and hope things get better than it is to die knowing they could have done.

Any advice would be appreciated, as I’m completely at a loss on what to do and I think it’s time to make a decision. Keep going, or give up? What do you think?

Thanks for taking time to read this and answer. I really do appreciate it.

I feel for you. I really do. Your life sucks right now, but could it honestly get any worse? So if this is as bad as it can get, then things can only get better. Definitely find a new shrink who has time for you. Go at least once a week if you can. And hopefully you will find some meds that will work great for you. Sometimes it takes a few weeks for them to start working, though.
Just don’t kill yourself. At least let someone know where you are right now, in terms of your suicidal thoughts.

well the unreal feelings have been minimal…well still ther but im just letting them fly by.
but new tihngs have popped up(bummer)
so these past few days i have been noticing things have look a little bit way to coincedential…and or similar…here are some of the things that freaked me out…or still are.
well my friend got a date with a girl named maria…..i didnt kow who mat=ria was…until my friend tells me she has a date with a guy named mora(my friend who got a date) so that was coincedential. then one morning i needed money….my mom didnt have change so i stepped outside…there were 2 dollars conviniently on the front step…..then the day before yesterday i was talking to this friend who i hasdnt seen in like a year…then the next day i went to library…and there she was….and i asked her if went to the library often and she said no…it was her firsttime…she’d been there in a while…(i hardly ever go to the library as well.)then i got a pm on panic end withand the guy said that he was wonderig i had got his message….cause his computer shutdown..or something like that..then today somone els wrote me an email(not from panicend) and was was wondering if i had gotten their message….cause their computer shut down unexpectedley.
that is coincedential!!!!!

and so thngs look different now.
i live in los angeles with a head on view of downtown l.a buildings(i live atop of a hill) and guess what they look like if they have shifted to the right…or seperated some how…..they llook different…but then agian i hardly pay attenion to them except sometimes…..but i know they look different..not the same!!!
and sometime i look to one side of the sky…and i see the outline of mountains…….where i know there shouldnt be any.
and i tell my self…if the mountain shit..or really shift to te right drasticaly..and everyone doesnt notice then im either in a dream. twilight zone. or something eles. and this feeling of doom…and what am i gonna dooooo!!!!!!comes over me…and i feel like omg what if things start changing and moving what am i suposed to do….it feel slike my life had turned upside down..but most of it doesnt scare me…except a few things….like if all the thing i though werent possible now are..like dream world, twilight zone…its hard to ger reassured when everything seems weird..no im all paranoid and scared again…but in other ways i feel better….but i need reasurances for this..i think in order to keepaccepting andfacing…and oh yeah my dreams and memory and thought have sorta of just smotherd together…i dunno how to differ what i dreampt, thought, or rememberd….and i can hardly remember these past three months…what am i gonna do….i dunno if im alvive dreaming dead or in afreaking coma……(most likely alvive just panicking…but everytme i think no this cant happen..like moving buildings…i asayit can happen i dreams…and as u can tell..thats not good)
i know i have probably said all this already and your gonna repeat your self again…but im freaking out(not that bad though)
and i can hardly feel all that much..thats why i havent broken dwon…cause im do u know….panicky and more : /
but everythime somethin seems to go right..i feel like it cant be happening..so i tink its not real

sorry about the rambling
-emily
no meds im reaked by them
umm i already did… im taking to a phyc. they say its anxiety
seriously if you answers are going to be dumb or just bot helpful please dont answer…im really freaking out……and i cant really have jerks answer with stupid answers
im only 15!!!!!!!!!!
and ummm i already went to the doctors….said everything was fine :/

YES, you’ve got a lot goin’ on it that brain of yours..it sounds like your brain is "hot-wired" and you need to cool down those transmitters! Seriously, this is nothing so out of the ordinary compared to people who have "anxiety" disorders…Please tell your parents that you need to talk to a doctor..if they say you don’t, than ask to see a naturopathic doctor…..they too can help you with supplements that will "cool-down" your brain!….
As far as the things that were happening at the same time…
That’s gonna happen a lot in your life so calm down about it and just accept it!…
The operative word here is "calm-down" but please don’t use street drugs to do it, or alcohol…that’s just gonna give you another set of problems….
See the doctor soon, K~?…
God Bless, and if you are not a praying person, God can help you if you ask him to come into your heart and tell him your concerns..!!…

for like 3 weeks now my stomach has been killing me!!! its like always upset. like in the begining i was just really bloated and had excessive stomach gas. but that ended….and now its just alwas causing me discomfort (and i eat healthy and excersie) i don’t know why..
and lately when i get really anxious my stomach gets even more upset. how can i calm myself down when i get an anxiety attack???
your help would be highlyy apreciated=]

Learning to calm yourself when you have an anxiety attack is a skill which can be learnt - see the website below.

I had anxiety attacks, panic attacks, stress and even depression issues for over 12 years and found my solution here - no pills, no potions, no visits to anyone - all very simple - I like simple!! - worked for rme - hopefully it you will do the same for you.

You should go take a look-see and best of luck - remember, it is a skill, and can be developed with some application and it really works - for me anyway..

its like they have OCD or something like they keep talking about it like everyday like it has nothing to do with history just the future which is opposite of history like they do nostrodamus biblical documentarys mega disasters all that stuff like they a doc bout the end of the world then the next program they show is a different title but same subject like they never talked about it b4 which they have like its so annoying and repeatitve i mean like theyve been showing this crap so much they still dont think we get it like im a christian ive read revalations and i do know something will happen 2 dis world someday but still like the history channel right now is just babling end of the world this apoculypse that like omg shut up already dam always bragging about it
if u keep showing us this like everyday whats the point if we already get it already dam its taking up the whole space over other programs in the history channel that have nothing to do with the end of the world
oh ya one more thing what does axemen and ice road truckers have to do with history its just guys chopping trees and canadians driving trucks in the alaskan wilderness

The network had a change of president a few years ago and it was decided that the more intellectual documentaries weren’t gaining a sufficiently large audience. Research showed that they weren’t getting through sufficiently to what might be termed the ’stupid’ sector. This has now been rectified with programming about the paranormal, pseudoscience and doomsday, all presented as fact.

This came into my head today, I take it this was a panic attack I had a few years ago, Now I’ve had panic attacks before but not like this.

I was in the doctors surgery waiting room, it was a Friday evening and it was packed, I had waited at least an hour and was getting very frustrated, I hate social situations but that wasn’t even funny, I eventually had enough and got up to talk to the receptionist, I stood up my legs turned to jelly, My hearing turned to and echo, and my head felt like it was spining, everyone chatting in the waiting room turned to an echo, I had to walk out with my hands on the wall holding myself up, I went outside and the doctors car was parked I leant over it and eventually it went away but what was that???

I’ve had panic attacks before but I don’t think that was one, I was having panic attacks in that waiting room but doctors etc tell you to sit through them and that seems to be the end result??

edit: ok so I found what its called
Postural hypotension
A drop in blood pressure (hypotension) due to a change in body position (posture) when a person moves to a more vertical position: from sitting to standing or from lying down to sitting or standing. Postural hypotension is more common in older people.

The change in position causes a temporary reduction in blood flow and therefore a shortage of oxygen to the brain. This leads to lightheadedness and, sometimes, a "black out" episode, a loss of consciousness.

Tilt-table testing can be used to confirm postural hypotension. Tilt-table testing involves placing the patient on a table with a foot-support. The table is tilted upward and blood pressure and pulse is measured while symptoms are recorded in various positions.

No treatment is needed for postural hypotension. If someone with postural hypotension faints, they will regain consciousness by simply sitting or lying down.

The person is thereafter advised to exercise caution and slow the process of changing positions from lying to sitting to standing. This simple technique can allow the body to adjust to the new position and permit the nerves to circulation of the legs to adjust slower in older person.
Postural hypotension is also called orthostatic hypotension.

I constantly worry about what others think and how others want to be treated and will cut a limb off for their sake as so affraid of not being good enough or accepted that they end up being a real let down for me and end up resenting them even if they don’t even know they have offended me. It could be they forget to say hello to me if my husband and I meet them (i’m in the car when husband is showing his mother the new baby car seat and she ignores the fact i am looking right at her). I take things to heart, hate social situations as can never really strike up a conversation or feel comfortable chit chatting with ease. Tense up looking weird (doesn’t always go like that some days am confident but it’s such an act am so tired of having to force myself to look/sound enthusiatic. I worry about everything to the extreme…how i look, if my hairs done, make up’s done, outfit, how i look when i talk, how my mouth moves and looks crap, hate my teeth, hate the way my profile looks, hate the way i walk and think everyone is picking up on it but their not they are picking up on my nerves and saftey behaviour (CBT is so exausting) I just want to love ME but don’t want to go on drugs. My husband is so inlove with me and my child is the most adorabe human being on the planet and is 5.5 months now so i will have to stop making exuses to not socialise as i want him to do everything and have fun with his mummy. The sad thing is if someone offends me or does something that i persue as beng offensive to me I cut my losses, it’s so lonely not having true friends as there is no trust there with anyone as I always feel let down. My husbands family is huge and loud and take the piss out of things and i have grown to resent my mother in law as she always has something to say that i take as a subtle attack on me. Husband is oblivious of course as she butters him up by being fake and nice to me the other times. Does anyone else share the same issues, would be nice to start comunicating with ppl who do, it’s easier online as the "bubbly person" that lives with in me (my battered soul) comes out. Sometimes abit too much as it’s a release. it’s such a shame to suffer this as ppl say i’m a attractive and shy and down to earth but I walk into a crouded room filled with aquaintances and i crumble, don’t know where to look what to do, won’t let husband leave me if he needs to go to the toilet…it’s the whole not feeling worthy or interesting and hating the way i look when i speak, even though ppl think i’m crazy for worrying about it, I also worry i’m seeming fake…I also judge people all the time so i think ppl are judging me. I also don’t want to see a therapist as i generally hate ppl and don’t want to pay someone £££ out of my own misery. lol i’m 5′2 and think i look like a child when i’m out walking with my baby in his pram I can feel older people looking at me and looking down on me, even though i don’t look like a chav! does anyone else feel this intense strain on their life? I keep thinking y me, why the worry, why the stress I don’t want life to be like this anymore.
what part of no drugs do you not understand?

TOO LONG DID NOT READ